Red and White
by ohmydays
Summary: Everyone loved Hailstar. Everyone except me. Because I alone knew what he was capable of... // Frostpaw discovers the darker side to her Clan's beloved leader. My first fanfic, with more chapters coming. R&Rs adored! // Rather lemony in taste xD
1. Nine Moon Assessment

Everyone loved Hailstar. The elders croakily proclaimed him as the most courageous and noble leader that FernClan had ever had, and every cat, from the tiniest kit to the strongest warrior, looked up at him with a warm glow of awe in their eyes. As far as they were concerned, Hailstar could do no wrong.

But I knew different.

My name is Frostpaw, and I am an apprentice of FernClan. My warrior blood is as pure as can be, and my warrior's heritage can be traced back for generations of the finest warriors known to the forest. I am proud to call myself a true apprentice of FernClan, and I know that the day I receive my warrior name will be the proudest day of my life.

But until that day, I can only live in fear, darkness and a despised form of the worst sort of pleasure.

It was the day of my nine-moon assessment. My mentor, Cedarflash, gave me a quick smile as three other apprentices and I padded nervously into the forest, with the warriors following close behind us.

As we gathered in the sandy training hollow to await our tasks, a rustle in the bushes made us turn around in surprise, and the sunhigh border patrol trotted into the clearing: the young she-cat Birchfrost, her mate, Herontail, a senior warrior called Aspenheart and Hailstar himself.

"Hailstar!"

My mentor's voice was warm with welcome as he greeted his leader with a dip of his head, and the rest of us followed suit obediently. Hailstar cast a benevolent eye around us, his tail twitching as he sat down.

"Are you assessing these apprentices, Cedarflash?" he asked, his voice rich and deep as always.

Cedarflash nodded his assent, his gaze resting on me as I sat up a little taller, pleased at the attention from the leader himself. Hailstar smiled.

"Would you mind if I watched? It's been many a moon since I was at one of these myself!"

Cedarflash and the other warriors laughed and meowed their agreement, and I exchanged a thrilled glance with my friend Redpaw next to me. Hailstar himself wanted to watch us! We both tried to look as responsible as possible, and I could hardly hear Cedarflash's calm instructions for our tasks in my excitement.

Cedarflash had barely finished speaking when we four apprentices, eyes shining with excitement, turned tail and dashed into the forest, each as eager as the rest to perform to the top standard – today of all days!

My task was to hunt near the stream, a small, fast-flowing creek that rushed through our territory and was dotted with hollow, echoing caves along the bank. It was one of my favourite spots to hunt, and I breathed in a deep sigh of contentment as the cold air from the water washed over me. A tiny movement in the reeds ahead of me brought my haunches down in my painstakingly practiced movement, and I drew myself paw over paw towards my prey.

Several hours later, with the sun sinking ever lower in the sky, I sat down in the cool of one of the caves, surveying my pile of fresh-kill proudly. Two mice, one fish and a watervole – no one could say that wasn't a good effort!

I glanced out of the cave, noting the increasing length of the shadows on the opposite bank, and decided to start heading home. My mouth watered as I picked up my bumper catch, but I knew the warrior code too well to take a bite. Tail high, I padded up the bank into the setting sun towards the camp.

A flash of grey nearby brought my head snapping up in alarm, and the prey tumbled from my mouth as I opened it to drink in the scent of my follower. In an instant I recognised it, and he emerged slowly from the reeds as I dipped my head, mewing in surprise, "Hailstar!"

The grey tom smiled at me, with my prey scattered at my paws, and I felt my fur grow hot at his cool-eyed surveyance of my clumsiness. I hurried to correct my image.

"I, um, didn't recognise you just then and I – I just dropped my prey to scent you, but I'm sure it'll be OK, it wasn't on the ground for that long, it won't really be very dirty…" I was rambling, I knew, but his sudden appearance and expressionless features had thrown me off guard, and I hurried to collect my fallen catches.

As I looked up, I saw his countenance had changed: now he smiled warmly at me, his eyes dancing in a way I didn't understand.

"Never mind," he meowed, "Happens to the best of them, I know! Here, let me help you…"

He bent his head to retrieve my watervole as I stammered my thanks and made to go back to the camp. To my surprise, however, he turned the other way and started back down the bank I had just left, going towards the cave I had used to store my prey. I paused, confused.

"Uh, Hailstar? Aren't we supposed to go this way?"

Hailstar turned and smiled again.

"Yes, we are, but I left a piece of prey here myself a few hours ago and I want to pick it up. We won't be a minute."

I frowned to myself as I hurried after him, for I couldn't remember scenting any prey besides my own in the cave… I shrugged as I followed him into the cool darkness.


	2. Forgotten Prey

Hailstar stood half-shadowed in the small cave, his grey fur glinting unnaturally in the dancing light thrown off the river. I hesitated in the entrance, laying my own prey down on the ground as I padded inside.

"Hailstar?" I mewed, coming to a stop near him and glancing up, "Did you find your prey?"

Hailstar turned suddenly, his green eyes meeting mine in the instant, and I saw again that odd flickering in them – somewhat stronger now - that I didn't understand.

"Oh, no," he meowed softly. "No, I must have misplaced it… but it doesn't matter. We can stay here for a bit."

His words seemed strange, and I couldn't work out what he meant. His sudden proximity befuddled me, and I took a small step back to clear my mind. To my surprise, he took another step towards me, and his thick, woodsy, male scent washed over me.

"Let's stay here," he repeated. "I might be able to teach you a few things."

I couldn't think what the leader of FernClan could possibly want to teach me in this damp, half-dark cave, but as I tried to form a question to ask, I felt a warm roughness on my ear. I shrank back in confusion, and saw Hailstar bent over me, his eyes aglow with that strange something in the dark.

"Stay still," he ordered, his voice suddenly soft. "I promise I'm a good teacher."

I froze, unable to disobey a command from the leader, and he pressed his tongue once again to my ear, the rough, warm surface rasping over my fur in a way that was both frightening and exhilarating. I could feel his hot breath against me, and I shivered slightly as his mouth moved down to my neck, his tongue all the time sliding up and down my fur. I had never had a tom be this close to me before, and I could feel strange surges of what seemed to be fear and delight running through me. I didn't know what was going to happen, but the continual rasping of his warm tongue against my fur brought my breath coming faster as he slowly moved down my body. I could feel the heat emanating from his frame as he worked and I half-stood, arching my back with delight as he slowly licked my pelt smooth, all the time working further and further down me. Pleasure had almost clouded my mind as the new sensations washed over me, but I had an inkling of an idea where he was headed.

Sure enough, as he reached my hind legs, not stopping or slowing down his insistent licking, I felt a fire race through my body as he neared the edge of my flank. I hardly knew what I was doing, but the hundreds of feelings crowding my mind brought my mouth open in a small gasp of pleasure as he rounded the soft curve of my leg – now but a whisker away from my core, which seemed to be burning like flames as he came closer and closer. As he heard my small intake of breath, Hailstar looked up, his eyes gleaming, and I gave a squeak of disappointment as he removed his tongue from my body.

"I thought you'd like that," he murmured, his voice low. I half-twisted my head and saw his eyes burning with lust, and knew my own face to be openly displaying my desire for him to continue. I had never experienced what he was doing to me before, but I knew that nothing in the world could possibly compare to the incredible feelings he gave me.

"Yes," I breathed, hardly able to speak for anticipation. "Yes, I do."

Hailstar chuckled softly.

"Then let's see how you like this…"

Before I could even comprehend what he might mean, Hailstar plunged his head back down to the base of my tail and flicked his tongue out again, this time running it once over my aching core in a move that made me cry out with surprise.

A smile curving his features, Hailstar repeated the movement, his tongue dashing again and again against the backs of my legs in a dozen delicious, teasing strokes. As my whimpers grew louder, he changed his tactic, this time swiping his tongue in slow, luxurious circles around my entrance. I could scarcely stand, so intense was my pleasure, and I could feel myself becoming hotter and wetter as he worked, until a great shudder ran through me and I felt a warm wetness spill out against my legs, which Hailstar's greedy tongue eagerly lapped up. Never in my life had I imagined that such sensations existed as this, and as Hailstar's tongue continued to move against me I found myself pressing back against him, against his hot, teasing mouth, wanting more, wanting so much more.

Hailstar's low rumble of a purr told me that more was coming, and out of the corner of my eye I saw him lift one grey paw, hold it over my core for a moment, then push it onto me, rubbing around and around so I could hardly hear myself as I moaned,

"Oh, Hailstar! Hailstar, give me more! Please give me more!"

And Hailstar, his eyes gleaming like stars, raised his head again and brought it closer and closer to me, to my shaking body, to my core that was almost dripping with wetness, and finally thrust his tongue _into_ me, into my body, into my most secret sex. And I knew I was almost screaming with pleasure as his tongue moved inside me, lapping against my walls, his breath coming hot and fast against me. Another shudder spun through me as I came again, and Hailstar growled, the sound sending only delirious excitement running through me as he licked up my juices that coursed freely from me in a thick white stream.

My legs gave way and I sank to the floor, almost sobbing with desire, my cream pooling around our legs as I raised my head to meet Hailstar's eyes. I could hardly speak, but I tried to beg him with my eyes to do what I knew he would do next, to finish this glorious scene of pleasure, to bring me utterly to my climax. I saw his eyes darken as he understood my silent plea, and almost before I knew what was happening he had positioned himself over me; his teeth in my scruff; his forepaws placed firmly on either side of my body, and thrust himself into my body.

At once, my delirious pleasure disappeared in a terrifying torrent of agony, and as Hailstar pulled out of me I could feel a warm trickle of blood running down my legs. I yowled in fear and pain as he thrust in again, his low growl of sadistic satisfaction rumbling against my neck. In, out, in, out… I thought the agony would never end, and I screamed my terror to the cold ceiling of the cave, and the cave moaned sadly back at me in response. This wasn't at all like how I had imagined it, like how I had wanted it. I had heard Streamtail and Eagletalon mate together once, half-hidden under a bed of ferns, and their soft sighs of pleasure were nothing like my terrified gasps of pain. I closed my eyes as Hailstar began to move faster, his groans of desire loud in my ear, the pain unabated, and resigned myself to my fate.

I don't know how long after it was that I felt the pain lessen, but I opened my eyes as I felt myself grow accustomed to Hailstar's movements. I could hardly believe it – but it was true. I could no longer feel any pain as Hailstar continued to push himself in and out my body. I gave a soft moan of relief, and Hailstar chuckled above me, thinking it was a response to his actions. And indeed, as the muscular grey tom resumed his control of me, I felt the stirrings of the desire I had felt before return. Soon they once again encompassed my body until I could feel my inner muscles clench around Hailstar's hardness as he thrust it into me, and he gave a growl of approval as I tightened around him. I pressed back against his body, trying to get him to go deeper into me, and moaned with pleasure as he obliged.

It seemed after barely a moment that I felt, once again, the building rush of anticipation in my body, and from the suddenly increased tempo of Hailstar's thrusts, I knew his position was similar. My pleasure mounted as the grey tom continued to pound against me, and just as I thought I could bear it no longer it released, breaking away from me in a deliciously thick stream of juices that gushed from my sex into the world. I moaned as another surge pulsed through me, my whole body shaking as my built-up pleasure was unleashed. I could hear Hailstar's groans of lust as my cream flowed over his legs, and barely an instant later he himself reached his pleasure, and with a yowl of triumph pumped his milky seed into my body. I shuddered as he filled me, his claws digging into my haunches, until his fierce flow gradually ebbed and died. The glorious moment was over, as quick and insubstantial as a shooting star, which, once past it's height, left only a pale, remembered streak against the darkness of the heavens.

I myself had hardly comprehended that it had ended when Hailstar was already off my back and by my side, his tongue coolly swiping itself over one nonchalantly raised paw. He smirked as he watched me clamber dazedly and painfully to my paws, my eyes still half-glazed with pleasure and the white fur on the backs of my legs coated with blood and semen. He paused to sniff the latter, and my whole body tensed as his hot breath fluttered again against my fur.

"I think I can see where you get your name from," he meowed darkly. "That almost looks like you've actually been rolling in frost, doesn't it?" He spun around to face me, his suddenly blazing eyes barely a mouse-length from mine. "I trust you'll keep the real reason to yourself?"

I nodded. I couldn't have spoken if I wanted to.

Hailstar regarded me dispassionately for a moment more, then got to his paws and left the cave, disappearing up the bank before I could even call out to him. I was left alone in the damp cavern, my fur stiff with his seed and my body aching from his terrifying desires. Now the fear began to set in – the fear that I had felt as he first touched my body with his tongue; the fear I had banished from my mind as pleasure overcame me. It threatened to take me over, and it was with trembling paws and wide eyes that I picked up the remnants of my prey and turned to leave the cave. I could still see the pool of my blood, my juices and his semen gleaming faintly on the smooth floor of the cave, and I felt my fur grow hot with shame as I remembered Hailstar's cold evaluation of the backs of my legs. I turned and left, my prey dangling sadly from my mouth.

It was only when I arrived back at camp, dispelled the curious stares from other cats questioning my lateness, dropped my catches and curled up alone in the apprentice's den, that I realised I had left one of my pieces of fresh-kill in the cave. I could see it now in my mind. Lying on the floor, the white scales of my caught fish bright against the darkness of its blood.


	3. Under the Maple Tree

"Have you seen Frostpaw?"

Cedarflash's irritable voice broke through Rookpaw's meal, and the young tom looked up to see the brown warrior pacing back and forth by the camp entrance.  
"Not since this morning," he mewed, swallowing. "Why? Is she missing again?"

Cedarflash nodded, his eyes betraying the anxiety that his irritated exterior hid. Rookpaw lowered his eyes back to his meal, his insides writhing with a mixture of irritation and concern. Frostpaw had been disappearing from camp and training sessions for nearly a moon now, and no one could prise the reason out of her. If pressed, she merely shrugged and muttered that she had been hunting. Only occasionally, however, did she ever come back with prey. So what was she doing? Many cats in the Clan had begun to notice her absences, and Rookpaw felt that she couldn't keep it up for long until she would be hauled up in front of Hailstar. Her performance during training sessions was suffering accordingly, and Rookpaw could see Cedarflash's impatience at his apprentice as she missed a catch or fluffed up a fight. And that wasn't all – Rookpaw noticed that Frostpaw had started to take less care of herself as well as her training: her pelt, normally a gleaming pale grey, had started to become matted and dirty; the white markings on her legs and chest were almost black from lack of care. Her eyes were as dull as pebbles, devoid of the invigorating spark they used to carry; her tail dragged limply in the dust behind her; and often when she walked she winced slightly, as though one of her legs was paining her. Rookpaw could not image what might have happened to induce such a change in her, but as he swallowed the last of his food he vowed to find out what it was when she came back.

Frostpaw didn't return home until sunhigh, by which time Rookpaw had almost despaired of talking to her before the day was out. She slunk in through the camp entrance, her eyes downcast, and made to disappear into the apprentice's den when Rookpaw bounded over to her.

"Frostpaw!" he meowed, coming to a stop beside her. Frostpaw looked up at once, her eyes wary.

"What?"

Rookpaw was slightly taken aback. Her voice was harsh, and as she spoke her ears flattened warningly against her head. Normally, Frostpaw would be eager to chat and fool around, but now even addressing her seemed risky.

"N-Nothing!" stammered Rookpaw. "I was just wondering where you went this morning. Cedarflash was looking for you."

The grey she-cat's eyes darkened, and she took a defensive step backwards, her lip curling over her teeth.

"It's none of your business," she spat, "I went hunting. That's all." She made to turn away, but anger surged through Rookpaw, and he dashed in front of her, his voice a menacing snarl.

"It _is_ my business!" he growled. "You've missed almost every training session we've had since our assessment! You never come home with prey and you hardly even _talk_ to anyone now! Don't think that half the Clan hasn't noticed you're acting so mouse-brained, because they have!"

Rookpaw paused for breath, his sides heaving, and Frostpaw stared at him. Rookpaw hesitated, wondering if he'd been too harsh, but he quickly changed his mind as Frostpaw's legs stiffened, her ears pressed flat against her head and her eyes like pieces of yellow flint. Her tail swished slowly from side to side, and she stalked towards Rookpaw until her muzzle was pressed right against his.

"You don't even know what you're talking about, do you?" she hissed, her eyes ablaze with fury. "You haven't the faintest idea what's going on, do you? _Do you?_"

Rookpaw shook his head, trying to drop her furious gaze. Confusion and fear raced through him, and all of a sudden he longed for the easy friendship that he and Frostpaw had shared but a moon ago. In a small, sad gesture of comfort, he reached out to nuzzle against her cheek, trying to calm his friend as she unleashed her anger on him. Frostpaw froze at his caress, and Rookpaw felt a thrill of relief run through him as she stopped in her tyrannade. He gave her a quick lick on the ear, his tongue running swiftly across her fur in the achingly familiar gesture they had shared so many times. When Frostpaw still didn't move, he repeated the action, glad that they could finally share tongues together as they used to.

"Oh, yes," she murmured suddenly, and Rookpaw jumped at her tone. It was unlike any he had ever heard her utter, one that revealed anticipation and surrender and joy in just those two small, breathed words. Worried, he glanced up at her face, and saw that her eyes were glazed, fixed adoringly on him, and as he watched she suddenly half-sat down, her hind legs splayed and her tail arched over her footpaws.

Confusion whirled through Rookpaw's mind as he stared at her in this strange new position, which became stronger and more fearful as Frostpaw did not get up from the ground, but half-turned her head to gaze imploringly at him, her tail flicking becomingly by her legs.

"Frostpaw?" he mewed uncertainly, and, like her name had been a charm, the grey she-cat blinked and looked up. The clouded look left her eyes and she shook her head as though to clear it. She scrambled to her paws, not meeting his gaze, and stood as though not sure what she should do.

"Frostpaw?" repeated Rookpaw, and concern for his friend made him take a step closer to her, but Frostpaw took one scared glance at him and disappeared into the apprentice's den, her head down and her tail scuffing the ground behind her.

All of a sudden, Rookpaw felt a great sense of bereavement: he could hear Frostpaw turning around in her den before she lay down, and the thought that one of his best friends would not trust him enough to tell him her problems was as though he had received a blow to the stomach. Suddenly tired, he padded a few steps back to where Frostpaw had been but a moment ago, and curled up on the ground, glad for the possibility to escape for a moment in sleep. As he closed his eyes, Rookpaw noticed a strange, pungent scent masking the familiar woodsy ones of the camp. He sniffed around at the ground, trying to locate it, and found a small puddle of some translucent fluid pooled on the ground where Frostpaw had lain. He sniffed it again, and was surprised by the strength of it's scent: slightly bitter and somewhat salty; strange but not unpleasant. How it had got there, however, he could not understand. Rookpaw decided to leave it, and was about to curl up for sleep when a loud voice jerked him awake.

"Rookpaw!"

Rookpaw leapt to his paws at once, scanning the camp for the source of the sound. He spotted Redwhisker, the Clan's young, ginger and white deputy, who was sitting under a maple tree, watching him closely. Hurrying over, Rookpaw dipped his head in greeting and sat down.

"Yes, Redwhisker?"

Redwhisker regarded Rookpaw closely for a moment, as though wrestling with some inner turmoil, then burst out,

"I saw you talking to Frostpaw just now."

Rookpaw nodded in assent.

"I was trying to get her to tell me where she's been going recently," he admitted. "She's missed almost every training practice we've had, and she won't even talk to me any more!"

Redwhisker flicked his tail in irritation.

"Yes, I've noticed that too," he meowed. "Something's happened to her to make her act this way." He glanced at Rookpaw. "Keep an eye on her, will you? It'd be an awful loss to the Clan if something happened to her."

Rookpaw murmured his agreement, then mentioned another thing that had been worrying him.

"Redwhisker, I'm just worried," he mewed, kneading his paws anxiously against the ground. "It's nearly time for our trip to Highstones, isn't it? Frostpaw, Reedpaw and I... what if - what if Frostpaw misses that too? She wouldn't ever see StarClan - then she might not become a warrior!"

Redwhisker sighed, and crouched down to level with Rookpaw. The black apprentice looked up as the deputy, yellow eyes meeting green.

"Rookpaw," Redwhisker murmured gently, "At the way she's going now, I don't think Frostpaw is going to become a warrior with you and Reedpaw." Rookpaw gasped as the deputy went on. "You said yourself that she's not been attending training sessions - I think if she continues as she has been this last moon or so, her naming ceremony will have to be put off until she's willing to learn everything she needs to know. I'm sorry, Rookpaw."

Rookpaw dropped his gaze, his insides writhing with anxiety. Frostpaw wouldn't become a warrior! He remembered her angry dismissal of his attempt to talk to her, and vowed he would try again. She had to listen to him this time, when her whole warrior's career was on the line...

"Thank you, Redwhisker," he mewed, getting to his paws. "I appreciate what you've told me." He dipped his head once again to the deputy, and turned to move away.

"Oh, and Rookpaw?"

Rookpaw paused, looking behind him at where Redwhisker sat, the ginger and white tom's green eyes betraying his anxiety.

"Do keep an eye on her, won't you?"

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**Well, there you go. Chapter Three all done! Phew, that took a while. I am the biggest procrastinator ever, so please expect big gaps between chapters like this one in future.**

**So, what did you think? Tell me what you thought of it being told from Rookpaw's POV - I might add more of them in later, although I think the majority will be Frostpaw in first. Sorry for all of you who were looking for something more like Chapter Two, but there's more of that coming up, trust me ;) **

**Oh, and a note from Chapter One - I mentioned Frostpaw looking at her friend Redpaw. That's a typo - it should be Reedpaw, but FF won't let me change it, grr. Just t avoid confusion ^^**


	4. Lodged Thorn

With a sinking heart, I watched the sun slowly reach its peak and begin its weary descent back to the earth. I knew only too well what the coming evening would bring, and sure enough, as the sky began to darken into rich streaks of marigold and scarlet, I heard my name being called from across the clearing. Turning, I spotted Goldenwind, the medicine cat of FernClan, beckoning to me from the entrance of her den. Fear flashed through my belly, and I finished the mouse I had been eating as noisily and with as much gusto as I could, licking my lips in a satisfied way when I was done. Finally I got to my paws and padded over to Goldenwind's den, forcing a smile as I neared the cool darkness.

"Is it time, then?" I mewed, resigning myself to the inevitable.

Goldenwind nodded, sorting the piles of herbs with a paw.

"It is indeed, Frostpaw," she replied. "Are you excited?"

Excited? I closed my eyes against Goldenwind's kind face, a sigh escaping me as I contemplated the illogical idea of my being excited for my first trip to HighStones. I opened my eyes and gave Goldenwind an ingratiating smile as she pushed my pile of herbs towards me.

"Very much," I meowed. "It's going to be amazing!"

The medicine cat chuckled, studying my grey and white pelt for a moment, her green eyes soft with nostalgia.

"I remember the day your mother went for her first trip to HighStones," she mewed reminiscently. "She was so excited! I was only an apprentice then myself, and even I wanted to go with her!" She gave a _mrrow _of laughter at the memory and flicked me affectionately with her tail, noticing how I sat up straighter at the mention of my mother, Rowanleaf.

She had died a few days after giving birth to my brother and me, but many cats had spoken of her as one of the gentlest and most sincere cats the Clan had ever known, and I was always pleased when someone commented on how exactly I looked like her. It was the only way I felt I could be close to her, for I had no memories of her besides those imagined by tales told of her to me.

Goldenwind blinked kindly at me, her head cocked to one side as she watched me lick up my travelling herbs, my mind now on other things. I could feel her gaze on me, and my fur prickled with uneasiness. There was no way I could hide from a medicine cat...

"Are you feeling alright, dear?" she mewed finally, her green eyes soft as she regarded me.

I could hear my own heartbeat in my ears, and I knew my breath was coming fast as I forced myself to meet her eyes.

"Yes!" I mewed, too fast to be telling the truth. "Yes, I'm fine, thank you."

Goldenwind looked as though she were going to say more, but at that moment the rest of the party came in - the four other cats with whom I was making my first journey to HighStones: my brother, Reedpaw, his and my friend Rookpaw; Blazeheart, a dark ginger tom, and finally, Hailstar.

The grey tom had been talking kindly to Reedpaw, and the young, pale ginger tom's eyes were aglow with admiration as he looked up at the Clan leader. Hailstar blinked fondly at Goldenwind as they entered the den, and then he spotted me. In an instant his eyes darkened with lust, and I could see the fur on the back of his neck bristle in anticipation to be inside me again. I tried to smile in return, to show my willingness to comply with his desires, for previously I had tried refusing his demands and been met with a dozen claws across the face and belly.

In my heart, however, I wished myself as far away from my Clan's beloved leader as I could get, not only due to the changes I knew were happening in my body that very moment, but for the increasingly frightening ways he treated me during the times we were alone together. He held me tighter, thrust into me harder and kept me longer, hidden away in some lonely corner of the territory, with only the soft moaning of the wind to hide my cries of reluctant pleasure.

For it _was_ reluctant: I no longer desired to be with him, as I had the first few times when I was overcome by his attentions. Now I dreaded the moment when he would appear through the undergrowth during my training session and beckon discreetly for me, or pad out from his den and eye me hungrily, and I would drop everything and excuse myself to go and please him.

Now, however, with four other cats watching him attentively, Hailstar could only flick his ear in greeting to me, but as he brushed past me to get to his herbs he ran his tail swiftly and discreetly down my side and over my sex, making me gasp with pleasure at the sudden sensation. The others glanced at me concernedly, and I hastily changed my gasp into a cough, and prayed no-one would look into it further.

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"A perfect evening for it, don't you think, Frostpaw?"

Blazeheart's voice broke into my thoughts as we leapt over rocks and ducked around trees on our way to the valley where HighStones lay. I looked up, startled, and almost tripped as I hurried to answer him, glancing up at the sky.

"Oh, yes!" I mewed. "There're no clouds tonight, so there should be nothing to hold us up."

Blazeheart nodded in agreement and said nothing more, both of us saving our breath for the rest of the way. The journey was even harder for me than it was for him: my secret weighed me down and brought my paws dropping like stones onto the loamy ground. My breath came in fitful gasps, and it wasn't long before I began to lag behind, despite my furious efforts to keep up. Reedpaw, noticing my absence, paused to look back at where I laboured to catch the rest of them.

"Are you alright, Frostpaw?" he called. His question attracted the attention of the others, who stopped to look back at me curiously. I considered his query ruefully, for I could hardly give the real reason for my slowness. Lifting one paw mournfully, I shook my head and replied,

"No, I trod on a thorn a while back and it won't come out. It's stuck in my paw!"

The others exchanged anxious glances, worried about the rising moon and time they had before it reached its height. I hid a smile of satisfaction, hoping they might tell me to go back home and complete the journey with the younger apprentices later. The smile faded, however, as I saw Hailstar's eyes gleam in a way only I could recognise, and the dark grey tom stepped forwards to speak.

"What a shame, Frostpaw!" he meowed, his voice lathered with sympathy. "It must be very painful for you. Tell you what -" he glanced at the rest of the party, "- how about I stay behind and help you get it out, and everyone else can carry on? Blazeheart can show you apprentices the way, and we'll meet you at HighStones."

The others nodded relievedly, certain of the promise in their leader's words. As one, they turned and continued their journey, leaving Hailstar and me alone in the empty forest. I shrank back from him, trying to avoid his gaze - my plan had backfired catastrophically on me. I stared at the ground, and knew Hailstar to be approaching me: his pawsteps seemed to echo off the watching trees, and I could hear his breathing coming quicker and heavier as he neared my crouching figure.

"So what was it you said was wrong with you?" His voice was soft in my ear, and I wrapped my tail protectively around myself as he began to slowly wash the side of my face with his tongue.

"It - it's nothing," I mumbled. "I'm fine."

"Ah... I see."

His tone was still light, but his movements contradicted his voice: tongue still flicking over my fur, he shifted himself so that he stood behind me, the heat from his body emanating onto mine.

"Well, just in case, how about I give you a little cure-all to make things better? It always works for _me_." He gave a low chuckle of laughter at the thought. I closed my eyes against the inevitable, and crouched down to the ground, lifting my tail over my legs to allow him easy passage into my body.

In one swift movement, Hailstar gripped my scruff in his teeth, positioned himself above me and thrust himself inside. I tensed, gritting my teeth against the moan aching to escape from my mouth, and bowed my head in obedience to his desires.

It was the same scene I had been privy to a hundred times since the first: me, crouched unresisting against the ground, fighting against my own pleasure; and him, tense with desire above me, his grunts of exertion loud in my ear as he pumped himself in and out of my body. For some reason I couldn't quite explain, I had always tried to stifle signs of my pleasure whenever he had me. The effort was always in vain, however, for I was never able to resist the scream of desire that tore from my lips as he and I came, our juices mingling inside and out of my hot, moist sex.

Now, as Hailstar's breath came faster, both of us nearing our climax, I fought through my haze of twisted pleasure and focused on the thought that had been nagging at me for several days: that of my fellow apprentices. My earliest memories as a kit curled up in the nursery were dreams of being among the apprentices I had seen through the warm foliage: learning to hunt, fight and follow the warrior code that was as old as the hills themselves. Now, finally among that number, I knew that my dreams had been snatched from me and replaced with this knowledge I should not even have heard of until many moons later, as a warrior with a loving mate to call my own.

I remembered Rookpaw's bewildered face when I, overcome with pent-up desire, had lain down in front of him in silent plea for him to take me, then and there in front of the entire camp. I closed my eyes against the memory, hating myself for adding that shadow to our friendship. Rookpaw would not know what I had wanted him to do until many moons from now, when his own mate presented herself to him in some intimate corner of the territory. I envied him that innocence.

--------------------------

The moon was barely a whiskers' length away from it's height as Hailstar and I arrived at the tall, dark shadows of HighStones. The others were waiting for us, their eyes glittering palely in the starlight, and Hailstar exchanged an encouraging glance with the other apprentices as we drew nearer.

"You all ready, then?" he mewed. "Blazeheart will stand guard at the entrance, and I'll take you three down. It's rather dark on the way there, so mind you follow my scent and step carefully. Got it?"

Reedpaw and Rookpaw exchanged thrilled glances, both nodding furiously. I forced a smile for my brother's sake, and the three of us blinked goodbye to Blazeheart and padded after Hailstar into the gaping black maw that was StarClan's secret home.

I was instantly afraid of the complete darkness that surrounded me, and glanced back fearfully to make sure the entrance had not disappeared. I could hear Reedpaw and Rookpaw's sharp intakes of breath at the total lack of light, and pressed myself against the comforting softness of my brother's fur.

"Are you ready?"

Hailstar's voice made us jump, and I glanced around at where the sound had come from, picking up the leader's smell as we mewed our assent. We followed his scent through the darkness, whiskers brushing occasionally against the stone walls of the tunnel, and padded uncertainly down what seemed to be a slope, blindly trusting in our leader's sense of direction. I was first behind him, with Rookpaw and Reedpaw a few paces after me, and I could hear their scared, quickened breathing as I fought to control my own.

Suddenly, Hailstar's scent filled my nose, and I took another step forwards and almost ran into him, for he had stopped suddenly in the tunnel. The other two apprentices followed my lead, and walked promptly into Hailstar's side.

"Go back," he meowed calmly. "I'm very sorry, I took a wrong turning. Turn around!"

I could hear the other two bumbling around the in darkness as they righted themselves and scrambled back, and was about to follow them when I felt Hailstar pushing me forwards, hurrying me back down the rest of the tunnel the others had just vacated. I tripped and almost fell against the unexpected force, but Hailstar continued to push against me until I had no choice but to follow where he sent me, and half-ran further into the darkness, the grey tom's musky scent right behind me.

"Where are we going?" I hissed, scared for the other two toms waiting for us further back. "What about Rookpaw and Reedpaw?"

Instead of answering, Hailstar bit down hard on my leg, so that I yelped with pain and increased my pace, fear lending me desperate speed. I hurtled blindly down the passage, Hailstar hard on my heels, until the ground levelled out and I could see a vague, pale light ahead of me. I hurried towards it, eager to be out of this pressing darkness and find out what insanity Hailstar seemed to be planning.

The light grew stronger and stronger, until the tunnel opened up into an enormous cavern, big enough to fit a dozen HighRocks inside, and I saw the source - a towering pillar of strange silvery stone that seemed to sparkle even in the darkness. It emanated a pale white glow that illuminated the cave so I could see the stalagmites and stalactites that had grown from the floor and ceiling to meet each other, and the glimmering underground river that twisted its way around the rocks. I had never seen such a sight, but I could not deny its beauty, with the crystals in the white rock throwing glittering flecks of light on the stone around it.

"Is this the MoonStone?"

My voice echoed in the cavern as I tore my eyes away from the light and looked around for Hailstar, my fear eradicated before this wonder. "Hailstar?"

I turned around, searching for the grey tom, and frowned as I found the cave empty. I peered into the corners and around the rocks but found nothing - it was as though the leader had disappeared while I had been staring at the white stone. My uncertainty returned, and I called for him again, my voice high with fear.

"Hailstar? Where are you?"

A small sound alerted me and I turned, just as a huge shape leapt out from behind me and landed on my shoulders, thorn-sharp claws digging into my fur as the pointed teeth pricked dangerously at my neck.

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**Ooh, this is a long one! But what happens next?! Actually, I've worked out what does happen next, and I've got an entire plot figured out, hurrah! Previously I didn't really know where this was going, but now I do. Good, eh?**

**I wasn't really sure what actually does happen when an apprentice goes to the HighStones for the first time, so I improvised a bit :) Love me for it, yes?**

**School's started now, so I won't have as much time to update as before (because I was sooo regular during the summer!), so bear that in mind while waiting for the next installment!**

**And always remember - every time you R&R, a kitty gets a cheeseburger...**


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